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沧浪书院绝六班霁月组第六讲作业 |
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点评
七绝写的不错。在初夏的时光领女儿看芍药花开,前后衔接连贯。非常棒
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点评
作业意象连贯,写景明媚可爱,全篇结构挺好。但“浅浅”东风,“宛”吟诗这几处词不够妥帖、有些生硬。“佳影”指涉泛泛,建议改成“芳信”...
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